If Only You Ever Knew
by Notch-in-your-bedpost
Summary: I was in that enclosed room with no windows, no form of seeing the true outside world. But I didn’t really mind because once Kaname onii-sama was there,I had no reason to be sad. But now...that has all come to an end.
1. Chapter 1

_****_

I DO NOT OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS......SADLY. THEY ALL BELONG TO HINO-SAN

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

**CHAPTER ONE**

**YUUKI'S POV**

Ah…oh how I love to see the sunset…it just reminds me of the times when Kaname sen… I mean onii-sama used to read those books to me when I was in that enclosed room with no windows, no form of seeing the true outside world. But I didn't really mind because once Kaname onii-sama was there, I had no reason to be sad. He was my world and that was all that mattered to me.

He used to read me that book and whenever we reached that page with the sunset…

FLASHBACK

"Kaname Onii-sama! Look how beautiful. Can I touch it?!"

Onii-sama chuckled and his eyes showed some sort of emotion that I could not quite understand...maybe…happiness?

My eyebrows scrunched together as I watched him giggle at me. What was so funny that I can't understand? I want to know!

"Why is Onii-sama laughing at Yuuki?!"

"I'm sorry Yuuki but sometimes Yuuki just makes me so happy! You'll get to see the sunset soon. I promise you that. You'll get to touch it and see its true beauty and nothing will stop me from keeping that promise! Even in the future when we become like Okaa-sama and Otou-sama, I'll keep that promise with you now and forever and remember I will always be there to love and protect Yuuki."

END OF FLASHBACK

I can't help but smile as I remember those words. Whenever I think about them, they always make me believe that there would be some glimmer of hope that onii-sama will come back to me the same way I did and repeat those same words I once spoke to him during all that commotion with Rido.

"I will always come back to Onii-sama's arms!"

Those were my words back then. I just wish I could hear his voice. I long to hear those words come from his lips but I guess that I can only wish and content myself with that. No matter how much I may wish it with all my heart to have him back, it won't change the fact that he is no longer the Kaname I know. A-and it's my entire fault!

"Kuran you're next!" I heard Zero's usual cold voice.

"I must thank you for having severed those troublesome fetters but I can't possibly forgive your existence any longer because you have dared to point that gun at her! Even if you had done so without real intent to kill her, I couldn't forgive such a thing! Bloody Rose… if you have awakened this much, then you must recognize my voice…as well as the taste of my blood?"

I turned to see Onii-sama and Zero. Onii-sama's hand was clutching the vines that came out of Bloody Rose. His hand seemed to be covered in blood or something.

"Would you kindly take down those vines restraining me? There is someone I want to protect"

I looked into Onii-sama's eyes and I saw two emotions flicker briefly in his eyes: love and…worry? It was soon replaced by determination. My eyes were quickly diverted to the retracting vines. I heard Zero's voice sounding almost shocked.

"Kuran, what did you do?"

"Thank you Bloody Rose."

Kaname's voice was calm. His hand suddenly transformed into a deadly claw and it was aimed at Zero who had already Bloody Rose prepared for an attack. I had to stop them! I had to! If I didn't…things may never be the same between us. Right now, it was a matter of life or death. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me but it seemed as though they were miles and miles away.

Kaname's claw came crashing down with a sudden force just as two shots were fired. All the while, my head was lowered as I tried to run as fast as I could, but as I heard those dreadful sounds, my heart stopped. Those were the sounds I dreaded to hear and quickly closed my eyes in fear of what I would see.

I heard Kaname's voice call my name. That voice…it was just so…addicting. I had to open my eyes but I almost fell back when I saw the horrifying picture in front of me. Zero stood there holding his gun still aimed at Kaname. My eyes widened as I saw Kaname slowly falling to the ground. I ran to his side, tears stinging the corner of my eyes.

Onii-sama! What's wrong?! You have to tell me!!"


	2. Chapter 2

__

**I SO DO NOT OWN ANY PART OF VAMPIRE KNIGHT!! IT BELONGS SOLELY TO MASTURI HINO-SAN**

**If Only You Ever Knew**

_**CHAPTER TWO**_

_His deep red-brown eyes caught my hazy ones as I stood there confused and almost on the verge of insanity after witnessing the sight before me. I had just barely caught him as he was about to make contact with the ground and let him rest him in my lap. My tears now began to flow freely as I saw the wound, which could only be made by an anti-vampire weapon, near his heart. _

_My tears blurred my vision and I quickly rested my head on his chest, careful not to put too much pressure on his already wounded body, but enough that he could not see my tears because I knew that it would make him sad and worried._

_I tried to quiet my whimpers that were quickly transforming into screams, but I couldn't suppress my feelings any longer. Hadn't I always done it in order to protect the ones I love? But this time the situation was too much to bear. I just couldn't help but think this was probably the last time I would see Kaname or Zero._

_"Kaname Onii-sama!! Please don't leave me! Please! You can't leave me here all alone on this earth. I don't think I can survive without you anywhere near me!! "_

_My voice shook violently as I spoke those words. I **knew** that I couldn't live without him. I would surely die._

_That was when I felt those familiar strong arms encircle my tiny waist. I looked up and into his warm, comforting eyes. His face was serene, just like always, and it bore one of his rare genuine smiles that he had secretly told me that he would only show to me._

_"Yuuki, you are my dear girl. Do not ever think that I would ever leave you alone! I will never do such a thing, you hear me? I love you too much! Even if I were to leave this useless body I will always stay and protect you."_

_I half-smiled at his reassuring words but deep in my heart I knew he would hardly make it with that type of wound unless he got help immediately. I scanned my brain for some sort of remedy that might…just might…help my brother. I had to hurry because this situation meant life or death for the both of us. I quickly thought of a quick method and untied the red bow and unbuttoned my jacket stained with the blood of my now dead uncle Rido with my newly acquired pureblood vampire speed. I frantically searched my uniform's pockets for a woogie or something that would hold my hair in place._

_Kaname studied my face as he also somehow watched me in my attempt to find what I needed. I soon found a ribbon and tied my back into one and slowly but surely bent over his body once more purposefully exposing the pale skin of my neck._

_As I spoke, I realized that my voice held a different pitch to it. It no longer sounded like a shriek but a hoarse whisper filled with love and determination._

_"Onii-sama, drink my blood. I know you will heal. No weapon can keep you from me."_

_I could sense that his eyes had begun to water as I felt his warm tongue on my neck. I closed my eyes as I felt his sharp fangs firmly pierce into my skin. It just felt so good to have my blood drunk from him and as my blood left my body and entered his, slowly beginning to heal the fatal wound, it was no different._

_Soon he left my neck as licked his lips, cleaning the blood off of his lips. He then flashed another one of his rare smiles, "Thank you so much Yuuki, I feel much better now. The wound has completely healed."_

_He gently pulled me down so that our noses were literally touching each other and placed a loving kiss on my lips. I loved how his dark brown silky hair felt on my face and I couldn't help but to tangle my fingers in it and revel in the feel of it. We hugged each other for a while when I suddenly jumped up and turned to the other limp body: Zero._

_"Z-Zero," I whispered._

_"Go check on him."_

_I nodded and sprinted to Zero. He wasn't moving but I breathed a sigh of relief when I heard him groan and mutter something along the lines of, "My head hurts."_

_I cautiously turned him over in the best way possible so as to not injure his arm any further. He was really hurt but he was in a better position than Kaname onii-sama by a long shot. But what I couldn't understand was if Zero was the one who shot Kaname, how was he injured?_

_Almost simultaneously as that thought rushed through my mind, I heard a dark chuckle from the back of me. I turned to see….._


	3. Chapter 3

__

**I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT...SADLY. HINO-SAN COULD AT LEAST HAVE LEFT KANAME FOR ME**

**If Only You Ever Knew**

_**CHAPTER THREE**_

_Y-Yagari-sensei! It was you who did this?! But why?!_

_My voice wavered slightly as I realized who had actually done the damage. I turned, stood up and walked closer to where he stood behind the trees, leaving Zero unattended._

_A smile crossed Touga Yagari's lips as I spoke._

_"I did Cross because if I left them, they would have destroyed each other and more people could have gotten hurt," he said darkly._

_"My name is no longer Cross, Yagari-sensei. It's Kuran. My real name is Kuran Yuuki. But you could have killed them. Even Zero who you call your apprentice!"_

_"Ah so you are that vampire's sister. You were a pureblood vampire at birth. I can sense it. I now understand everything; why he was always so protective of you, although I don't know how you managed to become human," he closed his eyes and smiled then spoke words that hurt my already sensitive nature,_

_"But you must know Zero means more to me than you ever will vampire! Don't you ever let me hear you speak to me in that tone again! I'll kill both you and your worthless brother who I see is, disgustingly, your fiancé? Such incestuous ways I can never accept! I'll kill you both if I so much as hear that either of you tried to attack any of the vampire hunters again!!"_

_I backed up slightly and my newly acquired unreadable mask, that Kaname taught me to use to hide my emotions, drastically shifted into an expression of fear and horror as I saw the truth of my ex- teacher's words. He wanted kill me and my brother and he wouldn't hesitate to pull the trigger. I had to be careful but I also needed to help Zero._

_"Damn it, Touga Yagari!! How dare you speak to my dear girl like that!" I heard Kaname onii-sama hiss, the venom evident in his voice,"I could just rip you apart for just looking at her like that, but I don't want destroy our parents' pacifist beliefs."_

_Yagari-sensei chuckled softly. I expected him to say something but surprisingly he said nothing, but his eyes still showed the hatred he held for our race._

_I backed up further until I would probably been in the perfect spot to be able to run away and escape this madness, but I couldn't leave the two most important people who meant the most to me here to die no matter how great the danger was._

_I turned my body to face Zero's unmoving figure. I dropped to his side and brushed his smooth silver locks away from his face. He groaned in pain as a sharp pain shot through his damaged shoulder causing his eyes to snap open._

_"Y-Yu-Yuuki?"_

_I smiled my old smile that always seemed to comfort Zero in some weird way. I wanted to be strong for both Onii-sama's and Zero's sakes._

_"Yep, I'm here. You're hurt pretty badly. Why do you always do these things to yourself? You're so clumsy at times. Let's see, I think I can help you a bit," I laughed just as I did when Zero had just sat there in the bathroom that day with his shirt open._

_I bent over and placed my mouth on the wound, closing my eyes as I did. My long hair acted as a shield so that I couldn't see whatever face Yagari-sensei had plastered over his face._

_I concentrated very hard and I imagined that I could heal Zero just the same way Kaname onii-sama did when that Level E attacked me with Zero in the town. Suddenly, a purplish glow appeared out of my mouth and encircled the wound._

_Gradually, the wound began to close and Zero's groaning softened into moans. I lifted my head to see his reaction and he was smiling at me. I smiled at him and hugged him._

_"Thank you Yuuki. I'm sorry for attacking Kuran too."_

_"It's ok. The both of you will be fine now."_

_I stared into his eyes. They were not the usual cold hard amethyst ones I saw when he would speak to Day Class girls but a soft gentle lilac. We stared at each other for a while until the silence was broken by someone shouting._

_"Yuuki look out!!"_

_"What?" I asked. Before I could even react, I saw Onii-sama standing in front of me. Then I heard a gunshot and I saw Onii-sama dropping to the ground._

_"Onii-sama!!!!"_

_I caught him once again but unlike before there was no response in his movements or anything. I looked up quickly to see who the culprit was: it was not Yagari-sensei as I expected but some other hunter whom I had never seen before. Before I could see his entire face, he was gone and Yagari-sensei just stood watching us, almost as if he were worried. Anyway, I decided that I would use the same procedure that I did on Zero._

_After a while Onii-sama stir slightly but he didn't open his eyes. I sensed Yagari-sensei moving closer to me and I bared my fangs._

_"Umm…relax Kuran Yuuki. I have something to tell you concerning your brother." His voice shook slightly._

_"W-what's wrong?"_

_As soon as he was close enough he pressed his lips to my ear, "When I said all those things earlier I did it because I knew that hunter was there and I didn't want him to think that I liked you guys. I don't want to hurt you. Plus he was the one who shot Zero and Kuran a while ago. But what I need to tell you is that the gun he used just now was an anti-vampire gun that is used to make vampires forget about everything that they consider dear to them."_

_"W-what?! What are you saying?"_

_"Kuran Kaname will forget everything about you."_


	4. Chapter 4

__

**I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT...SADLY. HINO-SAN COULD AT LEAST HAVE LEFT KANAME FOR ME**

**If Only You Ever Knew**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

_"W-What?! What are you saying?"_

_"Kuran Kaname will forget everything about you."_

_I bent my head slightly so my hair covered my face. I remembered the words Onii-sama spoke only a few minutes earlier: "Yuuki, my dear girl. Do not ever think that I would ever leave you alone! I will never do such a thing, you hear me? I love you too much! Even if I were to leave this useless body I will always stay and protect you."_

_Then I spoke with that smile on my face, "You… you are wrong Yagari-sensei. Kaname Onii-sama promised me that he will never leave me no matter what and when Onii-sama makes a promise, he never breaks it!! He can't possibly forget!"_

_I didn't look up but I could sense the change in his aura. His aura wasn't calm but it held a sense of sadness. He lightly touched my shoulder, "I'm sorry but I don't think he would be able to survive this and recall much."_

_With that, he walked away, his lean figure slowly fading into the snow that had now begun to fall. Tears rolled down my face again but this time it didn't stop. Zero soon encircled his arms around me. I cried and cried into his chest soaking his white school shirt._

_"Why? Why is it…that it always snows when I lose the people dear to me?! Why?!" I screamed. Zero petted my hair and held me close to him trying his best to comfort me._

_"Shh Yuuki. I know how you feel to lose your loved ones. I know. I can tell you something though…"_

_"What i-is it?" I whispered._

_"I don't know much about your family and I may not know much about Kaname, your brother, but I know how he feels about you and the words he speaks to you because I have felt the same way about you for so long. And I can assure you he will never forget you Yuuki. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't because the love you guys share is impossible to get rid of! That is one thing about Kaname of which I'm sure! So don't give up on him yet, Yuuki. Don't give up on him!!!"_

_I stopped my crying instantly as I heard Zero's voice shrill. I couldn't believe it but…he was… crying! That was surprising but what really shocked me was that he was crying because he was trying to believe that Onii-sama would be ok for my sake. I was also surprised to find out that he loved me too, and although he did, he was letting me know that he wanted me to be happy and stay with Onii-sama._

_"Zero"_

_"…"_

"Arigato Zero. You were always there when I needed you and for that I thank you"

And now as I sit by this window in Onii-sama's dorm room in Cross Academy, so many memories of him and me together play through my mind constantly.

"Yuuki are you ok?"

"I love you more than anything else in the world and if there was anything I could do, I would wish to get rid of all of your worries."

"Then prove it to me…become my lover."

"Kaname-senpai, I… "

"It's ok Yuuki; I know what you want to do"

"I will always come back to Onii-sama's arms!"

Those were memories I will never forget. I will cherish them forever…for Onii-sama's sake. But now, I've started to lose faith in Zero's words. I visited Onii-sama at the hospital once. It made me both happy and sad. I was overjoyed when the nurses said that he would be ok, but what made me sad was when he saw me.

I had opened the door, careful not to wake him but apparently, he was already up. He stared at me, his eyes warm as they stared deeply into mine, but there was something different about him. He looked the same old Onii-sama to me, but something about his aura and something else in his eyes were different

"Hello, Onii-sama?" I whispered.

He didn't respond except for tilting his head slightly to the left if that's what you want to call a response.

"D-do you know who I am?" I asked. I silently prayed he would show some sign that he recognized me. All he did was stare at me questioningly as the windows around him began to crack and shatter. I could tell he was getting annoyed but I didn't know the reason.

"S-so you really don't remember me…" I began to sob.

Suddenly, two vampire nurses rushed into the room on hearing the breaking glass. I dropped to the floor covering my teary eyes. Right now I didn't care how weak the other vampires lower than me thought I was. If Onii-sama couldn't remember me, I wouldn't care anymore.

I banged my fists onto the cold hard stone tiles. One of the nurses rushed to calm down Kaname while the other tried to stop my ranting.

"Yuuki-sama, you have to stop!!! You're hurting yourself!! Kaname-sama is hurting to see you like this!!!Please!!!"

"Stop it please."

I looked up as I heard that voice. It was him. It was Onii-sama.

"Stop it please, you are hurting yourself, little girl."

I immediately stopped. Although he may not know me, I stopped, for his sake.

"Gomen ne and S-Sayonara," I whispered and ran out of the door.

It has been only one week since I regained my memories and now that I have lost Kaname, I realize how hurt he must have been, having to watch me from a distance for ten whole years. It hurts… so bad. It feels as though my heart has shattered, but that still did not stop me from speaking to him. In fact, he came out of the ward yesterday and surprisingly we are now kinda friends. I had to start all over with him but that's ok. Once I can be near him and make sure he's ok, I'll content myself with that. I'll have to learn to manage new powers on my own to protect myself. Right now, all I have to protect me is Artemis.

"Hehe. Ah pureblood princess Yuuki. Give me your delicious blood and cure me from this madness… "

"Huh? Who are you?"

All I could do was scream to the top of my lungs.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE A BONUS ON KANAME'S POV!!!!!!


	5. Kaname's POV

_****_

I DO NOT OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS......SADLY. THEY ALL BELONG TO HINO-SAN

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

BONUS CHAPTER

This is a bonus chapter on Kaname's point of view when Yuuki visited him! I don't know if it came out good though. Please let me know how it was…

She came into my room quietly as though she didn't want to wake me, but I was already awake and I heard those familiar soft footsteps. I turned immediately and stared into her beautiful large reddish brown orbs. Her dark brown hair fell loosely around her petite frame complementing her pale skin making her more like a goddess than a vampire. Yuuki. She was my Yuuki.

As our identical eyes make contact, I sensed it. My aura suddenly changed from its warm loving presence that I always used when around her to a confused state.

Then I heard her soft velvet voice fill the room.

"Hello, Onii-sama?"

I tried to open my mouth to speak to her or at least smile but my body moved on its own and I found that my head tilted like a confused puppy.

"D-do you know who I am?" she asked quietly.

Of course I do. You are the and only reason I remain and live in this world! Why are you asking me such a question, Yuuki?! What's going on?! I was seriously getting annoyed with this useless body. I just wanted to ask her for once what was going on; why my body was moving on its own accord.

I felt like I was going scream anytime soon and that was when the windows began to crack. This was really getting to me. I could have sworn I visualized my mind being captured in some sort of barrier. If this was what was causing all of this, then I will definitely destroy it. I tried my best to fight it, all the while causing the windows to shatter due to my frustration.

"S-so you really don't remember me…" her voice was just above a whisper. At that moment, I knew she was going to cry.

Suddenly, two vampire nurses rushed into the room on hearing the breaking glass. She dropped to the floor covering her eyes. All of a sudden, she banged her fists onto the cold hard stone tiles. This made me hurt to say my dear girl in pain. I wanted to hug her, kiss away all her pain and tell her that everything was gonna be alright. I would hold her until everything in this hateful world that wanted to harm her or cause her to be unhappy like this was completely destroyed.

What if you were the one who was causing her the most pain? Can't you see that she is crying and hurting herself because of you? You are the one who is to be destroyed.

What is this voice inside my head? Maybe it's right. Maybe I am the one that is hurting the one who means the most to me in the world? She always seemed so sad when she was around me…

"Yuuki-sama, you have to stop!!! You're hurting yourself!! Kaname-sama is hurting to see you like this!!!Please!!!" one of the nurses shouted.

I had to stop her from hurting herself any longer.

"Stop it please."

That was all that came out of my useless mouth:"Stop it please".

Sure I wanted to help her but just by telling her stop it won't ease her pain, it won't make her feel any better. It would just be forcing her to conceal all her hurt behind a façade just like I did for her, but I don't want her to endure any pain near that! But now this body has restricted me to do anything.

"Stop it please, you are hurting yourself, little girl."

Why did I just call her little girl? It's almost insulting to think of her as a little girl anymore as I stare at the beauty before my eyes. How disgraceful I am. I should be on my knees apologizing to her!

She immediately stopped, "Gomen ne and S-Sayonara," she whispered and ran out of the door.

Okay. That was it. My mind snapped. The glass around me shattered again and my aura changed again.

"Get out of here now…please!" my voice was low and menacing causing the nurses to run out almost instantly. I couldn't take it anymore. Suddenly, my hand outstretched to the door and I felt my voice,

"Yuuki…please come back to me. I need you."

But I knew she couldn't hear me. It was just too late.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Please tell me how this was!


	6. Without my will to live

__

**I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT...SADLY. WHY IS THE WORLD SO CRUEL TO ME?! T.T **

**If Only You Ever Knew**

**CHAPTER SIX**

"Hehe. Ah pureblood princess Yuuki. Give me your delicious blood and cure me from this madness… "

"Huh? Who are you?"

All I could do was scream to the top of my lungs.

I turned to see this deranged-looking Level E hovering a few inches from me. H-how in the world did he get here without me sensing him? Maybe I was just too caught up in my thoughts. Anyway, I had to get rid of it or at least get away from it.

I slowly backed up as close to the window as possible, searching for Artemis. I had taken it off when I took a bath earlier and I didn't feel to put it on although the Chairman always warned me that I should. I turned for a brief moment to pick it up, but by the time I turned, the vampire was already there.

My eyes widened in fear. If I didn't do something, I would soon become this vampire's meal. Pureblood or no pureblood powers I still had to protect myself. Plus, I had to stop depending on people to protect me all the time. I grabbed Artemis and tried to attack but the creature was too fast and grabbed my arms. He slammed me forcefully into the wall, pinning my hands on either side of my head.

"What's wrong, princess? Are you afraid?"

I struggled uselessly in his iron grasp. I knew my strength wouldn't be fully restored until after a while, but right now I needed it! He pressed my body into the wall so hard that I felt as though my lungs were being crushed. I shut my eyes as quickly as possible in an attempt to shut out what was happening and soon would happen to me.

Ever so lightly, I felt a soft finger brush across my right cheek followed by a sharp pain in my cheek. I winced slightly in pain and opened my eyes slightly. What I saw made me gasp and my first memory, my beginning, flooded my mind.

This Level E's eyes glowed a bright crimson and his canines had lengthened into those well-known dangerous fangs. As the blood trickled down my cheek and onto my neck, I stared into those mesmerizing ruby red eyes and saw the great desire that this vampire had for my blood...the same blood that I swore on my life I would only reserve for my Kaname Onii-sama.

"Give me… give me… give me your blood sweet princess" he practically begged.

"NO!!"

I growled, causing him to be off-guard slightly. I shouted and pushed him with all my strength, causing him to fall flat on his back. I took this opportunity to run to the door. I was almost about to touch the door knob when I felt a hard hit in my face. Ouch! This hit caused me to stumble a bit, but I soon stood. I touched my hand to my face only to realise that my face was bleeding profusely and it wouldn't heal along with my wrists that he was squeezing just moments ago.

"Why is my cut not healing?" I asked, not really expecting an answer but I surprisingly, I got one.

"Hehe, my sweet princess, I found a way to infuse anti-vampire magic with my blood making all of my attacks deadly as the magic is all on my body but can't harm me."

Before I could reply or even ask another question, he then used his vampiric speed to try to grab my hand but I quickly dodged it. I made my way to Artemis and aimed it at the vampire but he disappeared. He wasn't like the normal vampires I saw Zero fight. It was different. He appeared behind me and slammed me into the wall. Numerous wounds began to form from the attack and the contact with his skin and I felt myself losing energy.

He grabbed me by my collar with such force and threw me onto the bed, making me land with a loud thud. I began to cough up blood, almost choking on it. The vampire climbed over me, roughly pushing my hair aside from my neck. I struggled beneath him landing weak coughs on his chest. He only laughed and grabbed my wrists once more shoving them above my head, making me drop Artemis. My wrists began to bleed more and it really was hurting.

He leaned down and began to lick my neck.

"So sweet…so soft…" I heard him murmur. I thought I was gonna be sick. I never allowed anyone beside Zero and Onii-sama to drink my blood and now it was strictly reserved for my one and only Onii-sama.

Onii-sama….

Even in this horrible predicament, my mind runs on only him. Kaname, he is my sweet Kaname. I love him with all my heart and I miss him as the Kaname I knew so dearly. I miss the way his long, wavy, dark brown tresses fell around his gentle, flawless face. I miss the way he looked at me whenever he saw me, his sweet loving smile.

I miss the way our lips met whenever we were together. I loved to hug him and play with his hair. I would always feel like there was nothing that could break us apart, but I realise now I was wrong, so terribly wrong.

I don't feel like I need to be in this world anymore. I don't have a purpose. Even though we have a friendship, it's not the same with him. I see that loneliness in his eyes that as a human I knew so well. When he awakened me, I saw his eyes held happiness and love but now that look has returned. Now it is just painful to be near him.

I felt the sharp pierce and break of my skin as this poor vampire slowly began to feed... feed on the one thing that could help cure his insanity even if it was for a short while, my pure blood. I was always so accustomed to the way Zero and Kaname used to be gentle when they bit me, but this vampire was different as he bit without self control, allowing the beast within his ex- human self to run wild and free.

It hurt really bad that I winced in pain, but I had quit my struggling. This pain was nothing compared to the pain I feel for Onii-sama. Also it was useless without Artemis, without my vampire powers, without my will to live. I closed my eyes now weak and dizzy, whispering only these words: "Onii-sama I love you."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don't worry she didn't and won't die... NEXT CHAPTER SOON!!!


	7. It's ok to cry sometimes

**_I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT._**

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

_**CHAPTER SEVEN**_

"Yuuki!!!"

Huh? Someone's here?

I forced my eyes open to see. I felt the vampire's weight still on me as he still fed. The voice called my name again as the vampire disintegrated into dust.

"Yuuki!" I forced to focus my eyes on the figure before me as it neared. When I realised who it was, I let out weak, soft gasp. It was the Chairman!

"C-chairm, Otou-san?"

And with that I passed out.

* * *

"Yuuki? Darling, you're awake…how do you feel? You've been asleep for a few days."

My vision was slightly fuzzy but it soon cleared up and I saw the Chairman hovering over me along with Z-Zero!! I tried to sit up but my head was on fire that I just fell back onto the bed.

_Onii-sama's not here…_

"Hn…not so good," I mumbled.

"Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!! My dear daughter Yuuki is hurt!!!!" The Chairman flew out of his seat and began his usual rants when either Zero or I was injured. He ran up and down the room crying like a baby. Sometimes I just couldn't believe that he was a vampire hunter and had just saved me from the vampire a while ago. Typical Chairman.

"O-Otou-san. Could you…could you just leave me for a while?" I grinned slightly.

Chairman almost immediately stopped, smiling sincerely, and nodding. Before he left, he turned and asked, "Do you need blood Yuuki… because I SHALL GIVE ALL THE BLOOD YOU NEED!!!!". I shook my head and smiled trying not to giggle at his childish behaviour, "The blood tablets will do." He walked out of the room leaving me and Zero alone. As soon as he left the room, I felt two strong arms on my shoulders. I turned and stared into Zero's cold amethyst eyes. His mouth was pressed into a thin line.

"Z-Zero?" I whispered.

"Why do you always do that?" he asked almost just as soft as I spoke except for the fact that there was a huge difference in his voice. His voice was cold and almost menacing as he spoke.

"D-do what?" I asked sheepishly. My eyebrows furrowed together as I tried to discern what on earth Zero was talking about.

"Stop pretending you don't know what I'm talking about!! We both know that you haven't been the same since the incident with Kaname but you always smile and act as though nothing's wrong! Yuuki you have to start caring more about yourself than you do for others!!"

I could almost feel his fury radiating off of him. What was wrong with Zero? I never saw him so angry! Did I do something to hurt him? Please tell me Zero!

"Zer-"

His words cut me off as they were laced with anger and the glare he gave me.

"You always sacrifice yourself so much for others that you always neglect yourself. You always smiled whenever you saw me saying that you want to see me happy but don't you realise that both me and Kaname can only be happy if you truly are smiling from the bottom of your heart! I can tell that you're just forcing yourself… I can see the emptiness in your eyes. They no longer have the happiness in them that they used to hold. You don't always have to smile Yuuki…it's alright if you cry about things that bother you once in a while…it's ok…"

At his last sentence, his voice and eyes softened and he bent his head. That last sentence caused the smile… no the mask I had plastered over my face to fall apart slowly and I couldn't help but cry. I closed my eyes and covered my face as my sobs grew louder. Slowly, I felt Zero hug as an attempt to comfort me as my body became racked with sobs.

"O-Onii-sama…h-he's not here, is he?"

I heard his breathing stop for a brief moment as I spoke Onii-sama's name. He then sighed and buried his head in the hollow of my neck and whispered, "No but trust me, he's not taking well."

"How do you know that?"

"I just know, Yuuki. I just know."

* * *

**ZERO'S POV AND KANAME'S POV IN NEXT CHAPTER!!!!!**


	8. Chapter 8

**_I OWN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING._**

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

**_CHAPTER EIGHT_**

**_KANAME'S POV_**

That previous night before everything that happened in Chapter Seven….

I had finally made up my mind to leave Japan thinking that Yuuki would be happier and smile more if I no longer was present in her life.

So many times I have stared into those wine colored eyes that reflected my own and saw the same thing I had always feared to see in her beautiful expressive eyes: pain, hurt, and worst of all, emptiness lingered in her eyes.

Her well-known bright cheerful smile seemed to no longer have a place in her vocabulary. Her smile no longer reached up to her eyes. She doesn't even look well. Her skin has gotten paler and she looks ill. It really pains me to see her like this: a mess.

Even her aura, I could feel it no matter how hard she may have tried to hide it, held a tinge of sadness. All of this I saw when she was around me now. I feel so guilty in this useless body.

As soon as I found out about the danger that my dear girl had just encountered, my heavy heart sank in sadness and in slight envy for the fact that I was unable to save her. Then I felt another feeling present: anger…well more like fury that another person had the liberty to taste her sweet pure blood.

I could feel my blood boil with hatred and my eyes flashed a dangerous red as I somewhat wished I could bring that vampire back to life and torture him slowly and watch with a sort of happiness as he writhed in agonizing pain.

I just might get Kiryuu-kun to join my plan as well and we should both enjoy it. But before I did anything, I just had to go see how she was faring after that loss of blood. After all, she was the most important thing to me.

I quietly, yet effortlessly walked into the room where I knew she would be by now. I also was helped by the faint smell of her delicious blood that was strongest in a certain part until it led to where I knew she was and the scent was slight now. My eyes glinted slightly crimson by the smell of her blood and again I felt that anger rise once more.

My anger was immediately melted as I opened the door and saw her sleeping peacefully. The rise and fall of her chest told me she was alive but it was slightly off, her breathing pattern. I took one good look at her.

She was indisputably beautiful despite her pale color from the blood loss, her small flawless face as pale as the moon against the frame of her lengthy auburn hair. Her skin glistened under the pale moonlight that shone through the large window. She was breathtaking.

My first reaction was to walk over to her and touch her. I felt myself drifting towards her and had to find the willpower not to just let my body move to her. I pulled myself to an abrupt halt and looking to the floor with sad eyes.

I soon sensed it. Another vampire in the room. I turned to find Kiryuu-kun staring at me with cold eyes.

"Kaname," his voice shook with anger.

"Where's your Bloody Rose. I thought you would have had it at my head already," I asked just as icily.

Apparently ignoring my remark he hissed, his voice echoing softly in the small room, "Why are you here?"

I sighed, closing my eyes.

"Kiryuu-kun, may I speak to you…privately" I turned back signaling to Yuuki as I said the last word. I didn't want to her to wake up and see me. As I turned to walk away, I left her one last gift: the necklace I had bought for her as a gift but never got a chance to give her the day she lost her memories. And I left her one last note as a goodbye.

**_ZERO'S POV_**

I nodded stiffly at his request and swiftly led the way onto the balcony of the Night Class' classroom cautious of his every move. As we arrived I turned and saw that he casually leaned his elbows onto the stone railing, not something that I really expected from the oh-so-powerful king of those damn bloodsuckers. I settled a few metres from him, in case this was a trick to lure me away from Yuuki. I bent over slightly onto the railing never dropping my cold aura.

"So…what do you want?" I repeated darkly.

"That anti-vampire gun trapped my mind behind some barrier and made my body move on its own and not following my mind's orders."

I noticed as he spoke that his eyes were no longer wide, holding that curious glint to it as though he were a little child but they were back to his well known murderous glare. Right then, I found myself feeling strangely relieved as I saw the Kaname Kuran I knew, although I no longer despised him that much. Well at least, that was back. I was really getting angry at his childish sort of behaviour. I ignored his present facial expression.

"So why are you all normal now?" I asked curiosity almost evident in my voice.

"I have found a way to break through that barrier but I don't want to meet Yuuki now because I'm not fully certain that it would be safe around her if I suddenly snap back into that trance again."

I was beginning to grasp what he was saying. It also explained his strange behaviour for the past week. He was trapped in his own body but now he suddenly claims that he can cure himself. Well that was the high and mighty bloodsucker for you. One thing I was certain was that Kaname Kuran would destroy the world if it was for Yuuki. He loved and cherished her with all his life, so he had to be sure about what he was saying. But as my mind ran on Yuuki in her present helpless condition, a frown crossed my face and my eyebrows creased together.

I felt my heart pumping furiously as I thought of her. She could hardly hold up. She didn't smile anymore. She just wasn't Yuuki! Although when I first found out about her true nature I wanted to kill her, now I realised that it didn't make sense to hate her. She was still and would forever be Yuuki. But now, I wasn't so sure of that.

"You do know she's in a great deal of pain after what happened. She keeps blaming herself for everything that's happened. She doesn't even want to drink blood. She says that the blood tablets will suffice but…but she doesn't even take them. She hasn't eaten since you got hurt. Nothing."

I sucked in a sharp breath and then continued shakily, "She holes herself up in your room and lies on your bed wrapping herself into the sheets or holds your remaining clothes close to her crying silently. I know that she does it to breathe in your scent and all of that. Sometimes she doesn't talk and acts as though she's in a daze or something. She's not the same Yuuki that we both loved, Kaname. I just don't know what to do with her anymore. I don't think I can stay by her side and keep quiet anymore…I don't think I can take it anymore, Kaname. You have to do something!"

**_KANAME'S POV_**

My eyes widened slightly in amazement. This was the first time I saw Zero sound somewhat desperate and also this was the first time I heard him call me by my first name. It was usually Kuran or Kuran-senpai or just vampire.

My normal reaction might have been to glare at him for calling me by my name and probably even worse, but now, I felt a somewhat calm feeling towards Zero.

As I saw how much he cared about Yuuki's well-being, I saw him more than just ultimate trash that was used to protect my dear princess but now a sort of friend. I was even a bit surprised that I didn't turn away as a variety of emotions spread across my calm features.

"I never even realised how much pain she was in. If I only knew. Zero, thank you for letting me know. But I still am not sure if I can return to her side any longer."

* * *


	9. Chapter 9

**_I OWN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING._**

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

_**I MADE A SLIGHT CHANGE TO CHAPTER EIGHT. I ADDED SOMETHING THAT KANAME LEFT A NECKLACE FOR HER WITH A NOTE.**_

CHAPTER NINE

YUUKI'S POV

Oh great, I couldn't sleep. My throat was killing me but I was too weak to move my hand even. I stirred unnoticeably after I sensed a presence near me in the room. It was a comforting scent and I really didn't feel strong enough to open my eyes to check where the scent came from.

Then I heard muted footsteps followed by Zero's harsh whisper and other voice which was very soft that I couldn't make out whose voice it was. I only heard the latter of Zero's words: "Why are you here?"

His voice shook with anger as he spoke. Why was he so angry?

"Kiryuu-kun, may I speak to you…privately."

Wait! I k-know that voice! B-but it couldn't be true right?

Two pairs of footsteps slowly began to fade from my hearing and I struggled to open my heavy eyelids. My eyes opened just in time to see the trail of dark brown wavy hair falling carelessly but somewhat neat onto the perfect white uniform, which only belonged to someone of the Night Class, as the person walked out.

Kaname you came…even though you don't remember me.

I half smiled and fell back into the only place that I could make everything absolutely perfect and normal again: my dreamland.

When I awoke the next night, I opened my eyes. Was it all a dream about seeing Kaname? I saw something glisten faintly from the night table.

I turned slightly and saw a gold necklace embedded with diamonds and a large ruby with my name engraved on it hung at the end. It was beautiful. I reached out a weak hand to the necklace and pulled it to my face.

Something fell from beneath it and onto my bed: a note. Did Zero give me the necklace? He cares about me so much.

I unfolded the piece of paper and gasped in surprised as I recognized Kaname's handwriting. I gulped as I began to read. What was he gonna say?

**Dear Yuuki, my love,**

**I am so very sorry that I caused you all this pain. I promised you that I would protect you as long as I live and would risk anything for you. But I guess…that sometimes we promise things and then we can't keep those promises.**

**I'm sorry for having to tell you like this but I'm going to leave tomorrow. I-I didn't think that things would turn out this way but I have to go. But I want you to know that I will always love you no matter what. Never forget that. If I could I would stay by your side for all eternity and protect you. I love you so much.**

**The necklace was a gift I bought for you the day our parents died. I hope you like it. Goodbye Yuuki. Keep smiling and you are beautiful if you stay as you are. My sweet gentle princess, have a sweet dream, my love. Sayonara.**

**Yours now and forever,**

**Kuran Kaname.**

I let the paper drop from my hand as the tears began to roll down my face profusely. I clutched the frail piece of fabric of my night gown in the spot where my heart was.

It was a feeling I could not quite comprehend. It was stronger than sadness.

"K-Kaname…you… you baka!!" I cried. How could I not love him after all he has done for me?! How could I?! I jumped up from the bed and ran through the door staggering slightly.

I felt as though I would drop from the weakness but I didn't have time to waste. I had to get to him before I lost him forever!

My bare feet glided swiftly and smoothly over the fallen snow. I ran crying his name not sensing him anywhere. He must have masked his pureblood presence probably knowing I would follow him.

As I picked up pace in my running, I saw a faint figure in the distance. I pushed my body to run faster and ran to the nearing figure. I recognized it as Kaname and screamed his name at the top of my lungs. He didn't turn and I felt myself falling forward slowly.

"Kaname…please don't go…please."

* * *

* * *


	10. Stay With Me

**_I OWN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. I WISH I DID..._**

_**If Only You Ever Knew**_

_**CHAPTER TEN**_

_As I picked up pace in my running, I saw a faint figure in the distance. I pushed my body to run faster and ran to the figure. I recognized it as Kaname and screamed his name at the top of my lungs. He didn't turn and I felt myself falling forward._

_"Kaname…please don't go…please."_

I expected to feel the cold bed of snow on my face but instead I felt strong arms catch me.

"Y-Yuuki? Why are you here?"

"K-Kaname p-please d-don't l-leave me."

He sank to the cold snowy ground, cradling me in his arms as my body shook violently.

"I'm sorry I have to go. If I don't I may cause you more pain than I did when I couldn't remember you. I don't want you to hate me."

I felt anger build up inside me; my eyes grew to slits, "Kaname Onii-sama." I spoke quietly, "You BAKA!!! How could I ever hate you!! After all you have done for me I could never hate you!! I meant when I said I would always come back to your arms!! Didn't you believe me?! Don't you know how much I love you?! I would do anything for you!!" I screamed, my voice weak but still firm. At that moment, I began to cry clutching his shirt weakly to me and burying my there, inhaling his comforting scent.

"Yuuki" was all he said.

"Just stay please. Don't go. You're all better now. Please Onii-sama, stay. I know I will die without here by my side."

He raised one hand and petted my hair then lifted my face and stared into my eyes for a while. He then used one hand to unbutton his shirt while the other held me. He gently lifted me so that my mouth was on the same level as his neck…where…his…blood…flowed…that…sweet…blood.

"Yuuki…drink my blood. You need it."

Clutching his coat as tight as I could without much of my strength, I shook my head and answered, "Having you here and staying with me like this is good enough for me."

I felt his soft hair brush against my cheek as he lowered his head ensuring that my mouth was in the hollow of his neck and the scent of his blood even stronger. My eyes glowed brightly.

"Go on Yuuki, I know you want to. Stop forcing yourself. You do know that your thirst for blood can only be satisfied by my blood. Just drink it please and regain your strength."

I smiled slightly and licked his neck lightly. I felt him shudder only a little bit as my warm tongue made contact with his chilled skin. I paused for short while as my fangs lengthened then slowly pierced the pale fragile skin of my brother's neck.

His blood rushed into my mouth with a great force. As the hot red liquid touched my tongue, relief and ecstasy washed over my senses. I drank it greedily that it almost hurt to feel the liquid speeding down my scorching throat. I continued drinking even after I felt better as I read his only thoughts of how deep and true his love was for me.

I finally released my fangs from his neck only for it to be replaced by his soft gentle lips on mine before I could even lick his wound. Instantly, I hugged him closer as his grip on my waist tightened. He playfully licked and gently bit my bottom lip. He smiled when I gasped softly. He then hugged me tightly.

A shadow soon enveloped our bodies. I looked up and saw Zero.

"Took you long enough to make up your mind to stay, Kuran,"he said pointing he said pointing Bloody Rose at Kaname, "But don't think we're really friends."

"Zer-" I started.

"No Yuuki, it's quite fine. He is not very smart. Haven't I told you that his brain is quite small and can't remember much? How many times must I tell you Zero not to try and seem smart for Yuuki especially when I'm here?"

_Okay…_

"Kuran! Why you little…"

"Zero!! Yuuki!! Kaname-kun!! Look I am making snow angels!!"

"Geez!! You freak!! Where did you come from?!" asked Zero.

Kaname and I turned our heads to the chairman who was playing in the snow. I giggled as I saw Kaname's frightened expression.

"Yuuki, why didn't you tell me that when I gave you to the chairman that he was practically insane?"

Zero just closed his eyes to calm himself as he lowered his gun. The chairman suddenly jumped to hug Zero but Zero ducked making him fall flat on his face crying.

"Kiryuu-kun's soooo mean!!" he said as he got up and sat there.

The next thing I saw was a snowball hitting the chairman's head followed by Yagari-sensei dragging a crying Chairman back to the Academy.

"You moron! Quit your childish games! I wonder if you really were the 'vampire without fangs'. Come on! Don't bite my hand! I'll hurt you! Can't you see she's cold?"

I hadn't realised that I had wrapped my arms around myself. Zero turned and followed them, stopping to glare at Kaname once then walking. Guess that'll never change.

"Come on Yuuki," Kaname whispered as he lifted me bridal style and followed the rest of my family back to the Academy. I rested my head on his chest and smiled happily for the first time in a long while.

_Onii-sama, only you…It can only ever be you. I love you so much. Never leave me again. Please._

And with that we continued to that place we called home.

* * *

**_Thank you all for your support in my story!! Hope you liked it!!_**


	11. Author's Note

**_I OWN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. I WISH I DID..._**

**Author's Note:**Hey everyone! This is just to let you know that I have decided to add one last chapter to this story but it's not continuing the story or anything.

One of my friends suggested that I should find a song that would go well with how Kaname felt in this fanfic so that's what it's about. I got a few ideas of songs but if any of you would like to suggest a song you would like me to use. I'm always open your suggestions.

Hopefully, by next week Tuesday, it should be completed and I should be abble to post it!

Well, that's it for now! Bye!

**+Vamprincess Yuuki+**

**P.s.** I changed my pen name to** Kuran Yuuki-hime**


End file.
